Smiles of Strength is a registered charity, founded in 2014 by an incredible young woman named Stacey Mowle. Following many failed attempts to find and connect with another young person facing similar challenges, Stacey started Smiles of Strength so others can get in touch with someone who knows what it’s like to face the same challenges they do.
Whether it is face to face by joining a registered or social support group, online chats through our interactive forums, connecting with another individual who has or is facing similar challenges and or adversities, or seeking the services of carers and health professionals, it is our aim that the Smiles of Strength online support network will assist you in finding the support you are looking for. So we can continue to provide this vital service free of charge, your donation is greatly appreciated.
Read Stacey’s story and follow her journey that led to the creation of Smiles of Strength
My name is Stacey Mowle, and I developed Smiles of Strength as a way to satisfy my innate desire to help people, primarily through sharing my experiences, knowledge and smile!
As cliché as it sounds, when 2014 rolled around I was determined to make the year ahead one of positive change, challenging myself to get out of my comfort zone and live the life I envisioned. However, it was at this point that I asked myself….what did I actually want?
It only took me a few days to realise it was the perfect opportunity to develop my lifelong dream – a service allowing me to use my own personal experiences and knowledge to help others in similar situations. Up until now I’ve worked incredibly hard to keep my personal circumstances silenced, because I didn’t want people to treat me differently, take pity or form judgments. However, after having taken the time to process and accept the cards life has dealt me, I can feel proud of what I have overcome.
I guess the starting point for my story goes back to when I was a little girl and my parents separated. I’ve always said it didn’t bother me because I was too young to remember, but when you only remember the vivid image of driving away in a packed car leaving your Dad behind, you know your resilience started that day. Perhaps it’s my quiet nature, but I was never really bothered by the situation. Visiting Dad just became normal, and looking back I wouldn’t have changed anything. I grew up spending more time with my grandparents and cousins than other kids, and while my childhood was spread across two houses, both were filled with so much love. I understand I am incredibly lucky that my parents worked so hard to ensure my life was as normal as possible. Today I have a healthy relationship with both my parents, and love them to pieces.
After my parents’ separation, my Mum met Dougie. He was an incredibly generous person and together they blessed me with the most amazing gift ever…a baby sister!!! My Mum and her new partner eventually married and I lived the free spirited life of a girl on a farm! With thanks to Dougie I became the girl who rode motorbikes, helped muster sheep and cattle, went shooting and picked blackberries from the paddock. Life was great. However, one day Dougie went to work, and didn’t come home. He suffered a sudden heart attack at only 31. I can honestly say that this was the event that changed who I was, and shaped the person I am today. It caused me so much pain. I simply turned off my emotions and supported my Mum. It was six months after his passing that I finally started to grieve. I grieved for years, and it was such a difficult and painful experience, but it put me in good stead for what lay ahead.
Eventually life redirected my family from regional New South Wales to Queensland, where new opportunities and fresh starts presented themselves. Not long after moving I became ill. I was 15 when I was diagnosed with the rare heart condition Hypertrophic Obstructive Cardiomyopathy (HOCM). Dealing with this condition will continue to be a challenge for the remainder of my life, but I am so grateful it is manageable; I know others aren’t so fortunate. I have struggled with the side effects of medications, along with their costs and the number I have to take – but at least they exist and are available. I’ve struggled accepting that I can’t do certain things or live the lifestyle I want to live… and I’ve spent hundreds of days not wanting to get out of bed to face the day. It’s a bizarre feeling knowing you are depressed, and knowing how to fix it but not necessarily caring enough to do anything about it. My heart condition has really challenged me in every way possible, perhaps targeting my happy and vibrant personality more than anything else. However, I’m still alive eight years on, stronger and more resilient than ever! Whilst I look to the future with excitement, I’ve learnt not to look too closely!
Most recently, I was provided with the privilege of dating a person with an incredible spirit and addiction to life. He was a person who brightened a room, always wore a smile, and infected you with life! We were together for seven months, during which time we went four-wheel driving and camping, whilst he later taught me how to ride dirt bikes! Life was great again!! Unfortunately the world came crashing down again one night in November 2011, when he sustained injuries resulting in a bleed on his brain. He was air lifted to the Royal Brisbane Hospital, where it was determined he had suffered a Traumatic Brain Injury, causing a stroke. We were told to prepare for his death, as the swelling in his brain was so severe. He remained in a coma for 3 weeks and in hospital for a further 12 months. He is currently at home, and I try to visit him regularly. Initially, visitations were incredibly difficult, but they’re fun and enjoyable now. Also, I can now finally say he’s a walking miracle, because he’s just started walking independently again! The pride in both saying and seeing that is overwhelming. Both the shock and outcome of this traumatic event, made it so hard for me to deal with. I couldn’t call the person who helped me through the tough times, because they were the one connected to the machines. I couldn’t get advice from the person who’d grown to know me best, because he’d lost his ability to talk. I could, however, take comfort in knowing that we had both become stronger, better people, and would always be there to support each other.
Through everything, my mum was not only my rock, but also the string and glue that held me together! In addition I had an incredibly strong support network of family, friends and colleagues, but at the end of the day you still feel so alone, because whilst they do the best they can, they simply can’t understand how you’re feeling or what you’re going through. That’s where I hope to help. I tried to get in touch with someone that knew what I was experiencing, but it seemed impossible. If I can be the person to help someone, or stand as the middle-man to connect people together, I’ll live life feeling satisfied!
As a Third Year Occupational Therapy student, I am immensely excited for the day when I graduate and gain the opportunity to spend my time helping people, however I'd like to think I could start that journey now :)
Tragically Stacey succumbed to her heart disease at the age of 22 on the 11th March 2014 when she suffered a fatal heart attack. She will never realise her dream to graduate from University or have the opportunity to share her experiences and help others. By continuing Stacey’s work through Smiles of Strength we hope to realise her dream of connecting people and standing in as the “middle-man” so people have someone they can communicate with and do not have to face life’s challenges alone.
(Stacey’s Mum)